Sunday, April 19, 2009

Catalyst


By definition, it’s “a substance that speeds up a chemical reaction, but is not consumed by the reaction; hence it can be recovered unchanged at the end of the reaction it has been used to speed up, or catalyze”. I keep feeling like a substance that speeds up “live” reactions while not consumed by them… but I don’t remain unchanged… every time I catalyze something, I feel that I lose a part of myself while becoming… stronger… I lose the soft part of myself and I start to speed up other reactions for other people… and after too many reactions… I became consumed and I started to realize the real meaning of being a Catalyst… it is not being or becoming something yourself or for yourself… it is being there for a purpose that most probably you won’t be able to recognize or understand before some time… all you can know is that you should be there at the specified moment to speed up some “reaction”… we don’t choose to be this substance… rather… we’re chosen to be.

Mena Mostafa

Saturday, April 04, 2009

Human


Ever since people invented computers, they try to create exact copies of themselves and to implant them in their brains… They try to simulate the way people think, behave and feel to give these machines a human touch… While doing so, people completely ignored the digital nature of these machines and their right to remain with their identity which differentiates them from “people”… Now… and after I understood this fact… I found myself trying to simulate what is going in his digital life in order to survive… I tried everything… I troubleshot my problem…reviewed my logs… searched on the internet for a solution… downloaded experience packs… stood up for a while… and finally I gave up and restarted … I hope this will be of help… otherwise, the only solution will be a complete aggressive formatting… I really envy him… we grew up together… he remained Robot and I became Human! And I really find it very hard to be a human.

Mena Mostafa

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Common Ground


I am not sure whether I face this problem alone or if there were others who think the same way too… I find it very hard to understand myself… One day she wants something that I don’t agree on and the other day she just lets it go… One day she’s very upset with things I find very normal and the other day she forgets about them… Most of the times she abandons ideas after convincing me with them… and most of the times, we don’t reach an agreement till after a conflict ending with a big fight… We didn’t mature together, and we became very different… but the only common point between us is that we both try to solve our problems as soon as they emerge… we try to be friends though we’re not compatible at all… I am sure that one day we’ll be able to understand each other and this is why I think she is still bearing me till this moment… She’s waiting to reach the Common Ground with me.

Mena Mostafa

Trapped!

I feel trapped and lonely. Lonely inside myself, like it’s never ending. I know that nothing is forever lasting, this gives hope to my mind...