Self-Confidence

Amongst the things I miss the most is Self-Confidence… Although it might not be that obvious to many people, I can feel it deep inside and I can’t get rid of this stupid feeling which makes me very self-centric inside and very others-centric outside… It’s weird how self-contradicting people can be… it’s the self that I don’t and can’t understand… it’s the self that I’m running from to face everywhere… I can’t escape and I can’t be a friend or pretend having friendship with it… It’s hard to be living with your enemy… especially when it is yourself… Even if I do trust “her” and even I have confidence in “her”… I wonder if “her” is “me”, can we be one?!!


Mena Mostafa

Appointment

Only 30 minutes remaining… and I am not sure when I will be able to see her again… I didn’t know what to say… I couldn’t even speak… I just kept looking at her and thinking about the remaining time… I then switched to thinking about when we’ll leave this life… we don’t know the exact time… not even something near that time… we just live and we don’t think… we forget the most important Appointment in our life and we know nothing about it… and do nothing for it… I kept staring and thinking… my throat was pushing my tongue to say something and I couldn’t… I was suffocating… my mind with my thoughts… and my heart with my feelings… She was starting a new life… and I was starting a new end… all what I know is that I walked her to her car… said good bye… and turned around with an eye full of tears… I will miss her… and I’ll keep praying for her to come back safe.


Mena Mostafa