Silent Scream

Trying to breath… to catch the running away air and to push it into my lungs… even by force… I was suffocating… trying to ask for help… to call anyone… waving with my hands… no way… they can’t hear me… or maybe they can… but they just ignore me… seems that my presence is of no value any more… I lost it and lost my meaning with it… I feel I am falling and still no one’s here… I lost my voice… I lost the air… and… I lost them, they are far away now… a very long distance is separating them from me, so that they can’t feel my existence and they can’t hear me… they can’t even notice me… I lost the cause I was fighting for… I lost the life I was planning for… I even lost the will of struggling to stay on my feet and… I swallowed the scream… my Silent Scream they couldn’t hear.

Mena Mostafa

And… I Failed

I used to hate failure and to be driven by my fear of it. Just a little while ago, I discovered that life has different measures for what I considered success, and of course for what I believed was a failure. I’ve been trying to avoid what I thought was a failure and to stay away from whatever leads to it to find myself finally face to face with it… I forgave myself many times and gave it other opportunities to reach the success I was heading with me, but it seemed that it started understanding and using life’s measures and definitions a while before I realized them. I kept trying patiently and persistently, and I stood up after many fall downs and collapses till I concluded this very simple rule… Failure is one of things we all have in common and success is the failure everyone accepts with happiness. And… I Failed.

Mena Mostafa

2

I keep meeting this number a lot these days… And although it is not a very large one, I feel very weak weighting alternatives… choosing between them… and making my mind. I face daily situations with it… I think the same happens with you too… situations where you have to decide as your second choice will take you far away from your first one, or the opposite… and then choosing successively between the 2 alternatives will draw you the way and lead you through your road… I don’t think it is possible to think about the tree of choices every time we face a situation… I don’t even know how we make our choices… and by time, options become harder, and preferences too… Currently, I don’t know which I should pick… which I should follow, because as usual… there are 2 of them!

"Your life is the sum result of all the choices you make, both consciously and unconsciously. If you can control the process of choosing, you can take control of all aspects of your life. You can find the freedom that comes from being in charge of yourself", Robert F. Bennett

Mena Mostafa

Ice Cream

Ever imagined how an Ice Cream feels? Each day with a different color… a different taste… in different hands… meeting new people every day… to the extent of not remembering whom it meets! With different shapes… in different containers… Bearing high degrees of heat then being frozen till reaching the final state of being something people like to eat… Accompanying different types of fruits, biscuits, nuts and chocolate… Re-forming itself to fit the size and shape of its container… Being in a cone or a cup is never an issue for it… it just adapts happily without complaining about the circumstances and the strangers it deals with… Sometimes I wish I were one… ending up by either being eaten or molten and… thrown!! Can’t stop thinking about how it feels!

Mena Mostafa

He Did This for Me!!

“They who are of the opinion that Money will do everything, may very well be suspected to do everything for Money”, George Savile

He lied… he stole… and… he killed… He spent his life fighting to get me… He lost everything… even me. Manipulation was his game… He was never honest… not even with himself… He deceived a lot of people… Injustice was his tool… Wiliness was his style… Greed was his religion… And all this was only to have me… I deceived him in my turn… My value is not real… I am just a piece of paper with many colors… blinding people like him… moving from hand to hand… sometimes useful, sometimes not… but always feeling guilty because He Did This for Me!! Do I really deserve it?!

“Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value… zero”, Voltaire

Mena Mostafa