“Yes”… “No”, “Right”… “Wrong”. Words, just words… Meanings are missing… are lost. Directions are meaningless. I wanted the white… and I chose the black. I worship home… and I stay away. My body is here… and my soul is there. Driven by my interest, obligated by my will, imprisoned by my choice… tortured by my heart… I can’t escape.
Paths, choices, decisions, consequences. I know what I like… I do what I detest. I sleep with a wakeful mind and open eyes. I am torn apart between my choices and my will. I suffer of choosing and doing the “right” and I can’t do otherwise. If I were to judge my choices, I would condemn them… of being right. I am broken… dispersed. I am… Pieces of Me.
Mena Mostafa
3 comments:
Feeling Broken ... pieces scattered everywhere ... every piece decided to go somewhere ... you are not there anymore.
The hardest thing in life is to learn what road to choose and what road to skip. You can't let your pieces to walk through all the roads. Once you choose your way your life will change forever. Life is too short to regret it. At the end you will find that life is the sum of all your choices.
I remember a common saying "when you base your life on principle, most of your decisions are already made.". You have to collect your pieces altogether ... become yourself again .. take your life your own hand .. may be you will take wrong decisions .. but that is how we learn to live our life.
What is the relation between the thing and its name, it's the meaning. When the meaning is missed the white would be just like the black. Do you need to collect your pieces, make sure to put them in the correct order. Maybe they would be collected in an order better than you got used to. You couldn't predict the future, so don't get depressed. Sometimes we need to move back for ش few steps in order to jump over an obstacle. And sometimes we need to destruct something to reconstruct it in a better way. Those few steps or this destruction is bad if we looked only at them, but if you take a look on the whole picture, you may change your mind. "it is possible that you dislike a thing which is good for you, and that you love a thing which is bad for you. But Allah know, and you know not", Holy Quraan (The Cow-216)
When you see a beautiful painting, you notice it always has many elements. No meaningful painting consists of one color. There might be bright and dark colors, contrast between them, and black lines. There might be shadows too. These elements give the painting beauty, and meaning.
You too, have been created from soul and dirt. This amazing mixture gives you many elements, many contradictions, many pieces. How does the painting look like? What’s the beauty in it? You might not be able to tell from the first glance, unless you have great self awareness. Nobody else can tell unless you give him the opportunity to see the whole painting and for enough time.
Gather your parts, alone or with the help of others. Solve the puzzle to see the meaning of it, and to feel the beauty in it.
The purpose of your existence is all about this struggle. The struggle between your desire and will, your mind and heart, your beliefs and choices, between right and wrong. Only this struggle would make you able to see the whole painting and to understand. Don’t lose your ability for struggle. Don’t lose your strength.
Are you willing to explore?
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